If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in the Maine.
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't even work there, you may live in Maine.
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Maine.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Maine.
If "Vacation" means going six miles to the State Park for the weekend, you may live in Maine.
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in the Maine.
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Maine.
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, you may live in Maine.
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Maine.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Maine.
If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Maine.
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Maine.
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph, but you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Maine.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Maine.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Maine.
If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Maine.
If you find 10 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Maine.
If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Maine friends & others, you definitely live in Maine.
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